Bob, an undertaker, came home one evening sporting a nasty black eye.<\/p>\n
His wife gasped when she saw him.
\u201cGood heavens, Bob! What on earth happened to you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Bob sighed heavily and dropped into a chair. \u201cYou wouldn\u2019t believe the day I\u2019ve had. It started with a call from a hotel \u2014 one of their guests had passed away in his sleep. The manager sounded panicked, said they couldn\u2019t get him into a body bag.\u201d<\/p>\n
His wife frowned. \u201cWhy not?\u201d<\/p>\n
Bob rubbed his temples, clearly reliving the ordeal. \u201cBecause the poor fellow had\u2026 well, let\u2019s just say he had a very persistent condition. A huge erection. They said it made closing the bag impossible.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh dear,\u201d his wife muttered, biting her lip to keep from laughing.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnyway,\u201d Bob continued, \u201cI went up to the room, and sure enough \u2014 there he was. Big man, completely naked, lying there stiff as a board \u2014 and I mean stiff in every possible sense. The staff were standing around, embarrassed, not knowing where to look, let alone what to do.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo what did you do?\u201d she asked, half horrified, half amused.<\/p>\n
\u201cI did what had to be done,\u201d Bob said with a weary shrug. \u201cI put on my gloves, took a deep breath, and tried to solve the problem myself. I grabbed the situation with both hands and tried to bend it down so we could finally zip the bag.\u201d<\/p>\n
His wife\u2019s eyes widened. \u201cThat must have been awful!\u201d<\/p>\n
Bob nodded solemnly. \u201cIt was. I closed my eyes, turned my head, and just focused on getting the job done as quickly as possible. I figured once it was out of the way, we could all pretend it never happened.\u201d<\/p>\n
She leaned closer. \u201cBut that still doesn\u2019t explain the black eye.\u201d<\/p>\n
Bob groaned, rubbing the bruise tenderly. \u201cThat\u2019s the part that really ruined my day.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell?\u201d she pressed.<\/p>\n
\u201cI had the wrong room,\u201d he said. \u201cThe man I grabbed was very much alive.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Bob, an undertaker, came home one evening sporting a nasty black eye. His wife gasped when she saw him.\u201cGood heavens, Bob! What on earth happened to you?\u201d Bob sighed heavily and dropped into a chair. \u201cYou wouldn\u2019t believe the day I\u2019ve had. It started with a call from a hotel \u2014 one of their guests […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":17786,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9063","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-reels"],"yoast_head":"\n