A guy with a nasty black eye boards a plane and settles into his seat. To his surprise, the passenger beside him has an equally impressive black eye.<\/p>\n
He chuckles and says,<\/p>\n
\u201cWow, what are the odds? We both have black eyes. Mind if I ask how you got yours?\u201d<\/p>\n
The other guy sighs.<\/p>\n
\u201cMine was a tongue-twister disaster. I was at the airport check-in desk, and the woman helping me was a stunning blonde with the biggest chest I’d ever seen.<\/p>\n
I meant to say, \u2018I’d like two tickets to Pittsburgh.\u2019<\/p>\n
Instead, I blurted out, \u2018I’d like two pickets to Tittsburgh.\u2019<\/p>\n
She punched me so hard I saw next week.\u201d<\/p>\n
The first guy nods sympathetically.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat’s incredible. Mine was a tongue-twister too.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cReally? What happened?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, this morning I was sitting at the breakfast table with my wife. I wanted to say:<\/p>\n
\u2018Could you please pass me the cereal, darling?\u2019<\/p>\n
But somehow what came out was:<\/p>\n
\u2018You completely ruined my life, you miserable witch!\u2019<\/p>\n
…and that’s why I’m flying to Pittsburgh.\u201d\ud83d\ude02<\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" A guy with a nasty black eye boards a plane and settles into his seat. To his surprise, the passenger beside him has an equally impressive black eye. He chuckles and says, \u201cWow, what are the odds? We both have black eyes. Mind if I ask how you got yours?\u201d The other guy sighs. \u201cMine […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":28177,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28176","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-funny"],"yoast_head":"\n